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I.
fleeting desire to jump
over rail under sea
in the air with the
sea bird sea gull under
water too join the whales
killer whale porpoise otter
sea lion cod fish halibut
and cold.
Deep Satisfying cold
already cold why not
colder lurch the boat
make it a mustake
join me with the sea
a fleeting desire to jump

                                    II.
                                        i still wanna
                                        wanna go with me?
                                        it's far it's cold
                                        but not as cold as you'll be
                                        without me
                                                                                III.
                                                                                     why i wanna
                                                                                     i don't know
                                                                                     it calls to me
                                                                                     it says let's go
                                                                                     the water shimmers
                                                                                     oh it shines
                                                                                     it wants to make me its divine
                                                                                     i wanna jump
                                                                                     i wanna go
                                                                                     it's curious, why is it so
                                                                                     it's cold out here
                                                                                     i'll bring me in
                                                                                     resist the call
                                                                                     not me no swim

                                IV.
                                    Swinging rope
                                    don't swing me in
                                    i've changed my mind
                                    not me. No swim
                                    today it's far too cold
                                    it's April still
                                    no thirst no more
                                    i've got my fill.
©2005-2009 ~rebelicious
:iconrebelicious:

Author's Comments

i was on BC ferries on the way back from vancouver (this is the ferry transport between Vancouver Island ((Victoria in my case)) and Vancouver) and was sitting outside on the deck. the thing i was sitting on holds a ton of lifejackets and stuff, so it's fairly big, and put me looking slightly down towards the railings, making it very easy to jump overboard, should anyone ever want to. i had a notebook of mine, and had been drawing for awile, when i noticed how low the rail was, and had a 'fleeting desire to jump'. it was very odd, as that would be a huge jump, and would definitely result in injury even just to the water below, though i don't think you would die. i wrote out words that just came to me as i had this feeling, in order to get rid of it, because i had never had such a strong urge to do anything so insane like that in my life, and i wanted to get rid of the feeling so i wouldn't go out and jump :S the first poem is my reasons of wanting to jump i guess, pretty explanatory, and each section/verse (I, II, III, IV) were where i took a break, hoping the feeling was gone. the break between III and IV was when i actually moved somewhere else, because i was worrying myself.

Looking back on the poem, i see it pulls together with rhythm and rhyme more towards the end, when i was starting to sound more sane, and i should say that none of this was edited, it all came right out of me in a space of about 4-5 minutes.

author's note * i have never been suicidal in my life, nor will ever be, (i hope) it's something i feel strongly about. this poem is about a moment, the closest i've ever gotten to that stage. not that i wanted to die or anything at the time, i just had the weirdest urge to jump ... peculiar :P

Comments


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:iconrosswell:
wow that kinda describes me and the water......lol.....though I probably would not think about jumping off of the ferry....lol
:iconrebelicious:
cool :D i hope i never feel like jumpin off the ferry again... it was weird =P

--
ø¤º°`°º¤ø
,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,
°º¤ø,¸₪ ®℮b℮l أ© أous ♥
₪¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
°`°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°` °`°
°º¤ø,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
,¸,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
:iconpalulop:
Interesting... I've often wondered what it would be like to jump of the ferry... unpleasant I'd imagine... that waters damn cold. Is the photo yours as well?
:iconserafina05:
good poem...your so creative! :D

--
You can never truly love someone 'til they love you too.
:iconrebelicious:
naw the photos not mine

--
ø¤º°`°º¤ø
,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,
°º¤ø,¸₪ ®℮b℮l أ© أous ♥
₪¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
°`°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°` °`°
°º¤ø,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
,¸,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
:iconrebelicious:
thanks sammy :hug: :D

--
ø¤º°`°º¤ø
,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,
°º¤ø,¸₪ ®℮b℮l أ© أous ♥
₪¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
°`°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°` °`°
°º¤ø,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
,¸,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
:iconserafina05:
your welcome! :hug:

--
You can never truly love someone 'til they love you too.
:iconrebelicious:
:glomp:

--
ø¤º°`°º¤ø
,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,
°º¤ø,¸₪ ®℮b℮l أ© أous ♥
₪¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
°`°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°` °`°
°º¤ø,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°
,¸,¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°

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June 12, 2005
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